My Heart for Prayer

Merely Canvas and Paint

2007-05-01T09:31:00.000-06:00

Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time, casting all your cares upon him, for he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:6-7

What is humble? Does God want us to think little of ourselves? What does it mean when the Bible tells us to “humble ourselves under the mighty hand of God”?

I’m visual, I understand and remember when I see things, so picture with me a painting, a beautiful painting, it’s breathtaking and moving, it inspires us to tears.

If the canvas and paint could speak would it say, look what I have done…

Was it the paint and canvas that brought joy and inspiration, or was it the painter who formed the paint into a meaningful picture? Paint and canvas have no meaning at all until they are formed into a painting. The paint and canvas merely served to show the painters vision, it merely reflects the painter’s thoughts, heart and mind.

We are canvas and paint, and our design reflects our Creator. We are the medium in which the Creator shows his glory! As canvas and paint, should we say, “look what I have done”, or should we say, “look what the creator has done”? We are beautiful works of art . . . moving, inspiring and joy giving. Our Creator is a master painter and we are his masterpieces.

So as I see it, being humble is not thinking less of ourselves, but thinking of ourselves as God’s creation, keeping in mind we have done nothing apart from God. It is saying to God, you are the master painter and I am the canvas and paint, everything I am, is by your hand. I have meaning, because you give me meaning. I have purpose, because you give me purpose. All I am, and all I do, is to your glory and praise. Humble is knowing I am merely canvas and paint.

For from Him[God] and through Him and to Him are all things. To Him be the glory forever! Romans 11:36

Lord God, I humbled myself under your mighty hand, I know all that is, is by your hand. Use this paint, and canvas for your glory, exalt me in your due time, I cast all my cares upon you, for I know you care for me.

"Lord Help Me"!

2007-03-13T09:20:00.000-06:00

It was one of those days! I know all of you know what I’m talking about! The day started off behind an hour and went downhill from there. After about the hundredth time of crying out, “ Lord HELP ME! Help me! Give me strength, Lord please! My mind actually wandered through a list of escapes... chocolate… a drink… a nap… I sure wish I had a novel to read… a sedative (don’t have anything stronger than Benadryl)…

I don’t know how long my mind wandered through the options of escape before I realized consciously, what I was thinking! Now I really was praying, LORD HELP ME!

I finally just gave myself a “time out”, with a cup of coffee and the Lord. I came across the verse,

Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength. (Nehemiah 8:10)

What is the joy of the Lord, and how is that going to give me strength? Then I realized, when I find joy in the Lord… I will find strength!

This day has just been one more lesson on keeping my eyes on Jesus. How is it that I let myself go so far down the road of self-centered misery before I do more than just yell at God “HELP ME!”? Okay… okay. I’ve got the message, Once again — keep my eyes on Jesus, not myself!

I pulled myself out of my favorite chair and picked up my iPod, I put on my earphones, and turned up the praise music as loud as my ears could stand! As Toby Mac sang,

I was made to love you,

I was made just for you,

made to adore you,

I was made to love, and be loved by you,…

my mind began to ease. And while I did the dishes… Superchick sang,

“and suddenly it isn’t what it used to be,

and after all this time, it turned out just fine.”

(My Superchick friends are so right!) and while I mopped the floor, Third Day sang. . .

“I caught a glimpse of your splendor from the corner of my eye,

the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen…

show me your glory, send down your presence,

I want to see your face, majesty shines about you, I can’t go on without you Lord!

I truly believe I’ve seen a tiny glimpse of God’s glory — only God could take the day I’ve had, and fill it with joy. (and joy while mopping the floor is a pretty big miracle)

So… from now on, my prayer will change from “Lord help me!” To, “Lord, show me your glory!”

Book review — "Get Out of That Pit" By Beth Moore

2007-03-09T08:15:00.000-06:00

I will say up front, I am a fellow dweller of pits! I won’t say, “former dweller”, because just when I am freed from one pit, God shows me more work that needs to be done & where more freedom is needed. I move forward day by day, by God’s grace alone. (As you know, if you have read my blog!) Okay, now that that’s out of the way — about the book…

The thing I appreciated most about Get Out of That Pit, was Beth’s honesty. It gives me hope knowing what God has done in Beth’s life. She was a pit dweller, and now God is using her to teach and encourage hundreds of thousands of women all over the world. Beth is a living breathing example of God’s grace, his power, his plan, and his faithfulness! Beth shows us that God not only delivers us, but will use our pain and suffering for His glory in unbelievable ways! God does'nt just deliver us, he refines us into pure gold and uses us to change the world! That’s a lot to hope for!

The second thing I appreciate about Get Out of That Pit, is the foundational teaching . . .call on Jesus, immerse yourself in the Word, & pray Scripture. This is the answer to every question, the solution to every problem! Beth makes it clear that more human will power is not what’s needed, Jesus’ power is what is needed.

The third thing I appreciated was the “freedom from Pit" Scripture. Beth leads us to God’s Word and shows us examples of pit dwellers, their deliverance, God’s promises of freedom, and examples of God’s faithfulness.
My favorite “pit” scripture is Psalms 103:2-5

Praise the Lord oh my soul, and forget not his benefits—Who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, Who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, Who satisfies your desires with good things so your youth is renewed like the eagle’s.

My prayer for all of us today is that we would never forget all the Lord's benefits and that He would surround us with songs of deliverance(Psalm 32:7)!

Back to the Book Club

Listen to Superchick

2007-03-07T08:44:00.000-06:00

The Ultimate Beauty Treatment

2007-03-06T09:07:00.000-06:00

I was listening to the song Beauty From Pain by Superchick… it so beautifully expressed what God has been teaching me.

The chorus of the song says…

After all this has passed — I will remain — after I’ve cried my last — there will be beauty from pain — though it won’t be today — someday I’ll hope again, and there’ll be beauty from pain.

I have come to the understanding that I need to embrace the struggle and pain, and know with all certainty that God is using the pain and struggle in my life to bring about beauty.

Consider it PURE JOY, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. James 1: 2-3.

I need to consider trials joy because trials equal maturity, wholeness, and beauty.

I have become increasingly aware of how limited my view of life is. I saw the momentary troubles and felt consumed by them. God’s view is so much broader and all encompassing. His plan is so much bigger and better than I can imagine. All these troubles and trials are developing in me perseverance, He is perfecting me and refining me.

So the question becomes, will I fight against the pain and take my eyes off God, focus on me and my problems, or will I embrace the trial with joy asking God to teach me what he would like me to learn. Will I with every struggle search for God’s wisdom and grace and have joy knowing God is making me beautiful. Will I say “thank you Lord, for this beauty treatment”!

Yes, yes ,yes! I want God’s beauty, I want to be pure gold refined by the fire and prove genuine (from 1Peter1:6).

It is so easy to get wrapped up in the details of our trials and troubles and not see God’s all encompassing plan. When we choose a limited perspective by focusing on ourselves, we limit our view of God and what he will do.

I don’t fully understand how God works, but I do know He is working on me — I know God has a plan and a purpose! God is scraping away layers of dead flesh, in ultimate beauty treatment. The cost of the treatment will not be too high — the result will far outweigh the cost. It won’t be today, but after all this has passed, there will be beauty from pain.

A People Pleasin' Wolf in Sheep's Clothing

2007-02-14T09:44:00.000-06:00

A light bulb just went on. . . I’m having one of those AH-HA moments.
I have been struggling with the “loving—serving” biblical concept, and the line that separates “serving people” from “people pleasing” . I have done a lot of reflecting and I have a confession to make… I am a “people pleasin' wolf”, in the sheep’s clothing of a “people server”. What a painful realization!

Here’s the catch, the light bulb moment… if I’m looking, expecting, and hoping for a “thank you” or acknowledgment. . . (you got it didn’t you?) I’m a people pleaser.
When we are “people serving” in the biblical way — all the glory goes to God, and the return comes from God in the form of blessings and heavenly reward. And your Father who sees what is done in secret will reward you. (Matthew 6:8)

This is how I finally connected the dots. I was studying love, reading the love chapter in 1Corinthians 13. What kept popping out at me was— love is not self-serving, it does not boast, and it is not proud! Those are not the first three qualities of love we usually think about when someone says ,“I love you”.

I started thinking about (with much cringing) the love I have given. I have given to get, more than I would like to admit. I have given to feel good about myself and to make people happy. What was really in my heart was, “They will know I love them because I’m so thoughtful”. I have been loving and giving, so people would think I'm generous. I have been affectionate, because I wanted affection. I realized if I didn’t get credit, I felt put-out! Wanting and getting credit is definitely self-serving! Proud, is something I always am if I buy a great gift or do a good deed. I can’t wait to tell someone what I’ve done. That is definitely pride and boasting! Even when I clean the house, I am sure to point out to everyone what I have done, as if to say… “ look how I am serving”.

To tell you the truth, I don’t know if I have ever fully loved God's way. I think the reason I have had such a hard time figuring this out, is because the behavior is the same, it is the attitude and motivation that is so different. Would we still love if the person never loved us back, or even returned our love with hate? Don’t we often reject someone who has rejected us? These words, I know I have said, echo in my mind, “if they’re going to treat me that way, forget them! I don’t deserve that kind of treatment!” Ouch! It’s a harsh reality, isn’t it? Are serving and loving any less valuable to God, if it’s rejected? Last week I made a big meal for my family. To make a long story short, no one ate it! I was ticked! I think I was upset because I felt like I had wasted my time and energy for nothing. But in reality, is God any less pleased with my serving if they don’t eat it? I still served. I think maybe God values our service even more when it’s rejected.

I think of Jesus . . . Jesus is our example — he loved and served with everything he had, even his life. He was rejected, spit on and ridiculed, but that didn’t stop him from giving us the ultimate gift of love and service. Jesus died loving and serving us! Jesus took all of our sin and paid the price, as we rejected him! What was Jesus’ response to the rejection? “Father forgive them for they know not what they do!" Now that is love and service! Jesus died, getting nothing in return. The thought of loving like that blows my mind!
One of the reasons I think Jesus is so great, is because he knows I’m dirt (or dust). Jesus doesn’t expect me to do anything on my own — it is the Holy Spirit that helps us in our weakness. It’s only through the Spirit that we have any hope at all! On my own, I could never love like Jesus, but with Jesus' help, I have something to strive for — loving and serving for God’s glory alone! Happy Valentine’s Day

My Purpose is to Experience God

2007-02-12T10:35:00.000-06:00

My journey continues. . . What exactly am I doing here anyway, what’s the point?

My life has been difficult in every aspect-- my health, marriage, friends, church, kids, and family, have had major challenges. I think the point God has been trying to prove to me is, He is enough for me. God alone is my security, he alone is my rock and my identity.

I was brought to a point of desperation, of total emptiness, so God could fill me up with Him, to prove to me his ways are better than my ways (Isaiah 55:8). I came to the end of myself and realized I needed God in a much bigger, deeper, fully dependent way. I needed God alone. I wanted to not just know God, but to experience Him.

I began searching God’s word. I was tired of trying to figure out what I needed! I decided to find out what God wanted to give me. So, I put down my grocery list of wants, and picked up God’s list of promises. I started praying Scripture.

I can’t even find the words to express the transformation that has taken place! As I stopped focusing on me, and chose to focus on God’s Word. God spoke to me in a whole new way. The tears drip down my face— I am overwhelmed by God’s grace, his peace, His love, and His forgiveness in this journey. My heart is overflowing with thanksgiving and praise! My purpose is to know and experience God. I have found what I was desperately searching for: the experience of God, His living, breathing, speaking, presence!

Oh Lord, your benefits, I will not forget. You have forgiven my sin. You have redeemed my life from the pit of loneliness and despair. You have crowned me with love and compassion. You have satisfied my desires with You, Your good things. You have renewed my youth and my strength (My prayer of Psalms 103: 2-5).

The things I was searching for, were not things at all! God is enough!

Oh Lord, you have turned my wailing (and boy have I done a lot of wailing) into dancing! You have removed my garments of self-centeredness and self-pity, and you clothed me with joy. My heart sings to you, it cannot be silent! Lord God, I will give you thanks for ever!
( my prayer from Psalms 30: 11 –12)

Oh sisters, let me tell you, God longs to be gracious to you. He will rise to show you compassion (Isaiah 30: 18). When the things in life are too much to bear, God is there to carry them for you. Dear sisters pray the word — God will speak to you in a whole new, amazing, life transforming, fabulous way! Our purpose is to know and experience God!

You may be wondering — what’s happening in my earthly life? Every circumstance is pretty much the same, there are still challenges on every front. So. . . what has changed? Now I have the peace of God that transcends all understanding, and it guards my heart and mind in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4: 7).

I now have the joy of the Lord as my strength and as I find more joy in Jesus, I find more strength. Therefore we do not lose heart; though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly, we are being renewed day by day (2 Corinthians 4: 6). I may be outwardly wasting away, yet inwardly I am being renewed! What a glorious feeling, even in the midst of crisis all around me, I focus on God and am inwardly renewed! I found my purpose! Oh sisters find Jesus — he is your purpose, and experiencing Him is the greatest, most fulfilling, joyful, strengthening, life-giving adventure you will ever know.

God never promises easy, only to never leave you or forsake you (Deut.31:6). May you experience God’s love, although it is so great you will never fully understand it, then you will be filled with the fullness of life and the power that comes from God. Ephesians 3: 19

Pray, Sisters, Pray. . . Bask in the experience of God!

The Armor Of God-- from "My Personal Prayer"

2007-02-08T09:22:00.000-06:00

This is why you must take up the full armor of God, so that you may be able to resist in the evil day, and having prepared everything, to take your stand. Therefore, with truth like a belt around your waist, righteousness like armor on your chest, and your feet sandaled with readiness for the gospel of peace-- ready to go tell others about the gospel. In every situation take the shield of faith, and with it you will be able to extinguish the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is God’s word.
With every prayer and request, pray at all times in the Spirit, and stay alert in this, with all perseverance and intercession for all the saints. Ephesians 6:18 HCSB

My Prayer . . .

Lord, I pray that today. . . .

•Salvation would cover my head like a helmet. I am Yours.

•Righteousness & obedience to you would cover me like armor.

•That your truth would surround me like a belt, that I would always speak truth and not be deceived by lies.

•That I would hold high my shield of faith; knowing you work all things together for the good of those who love you.

•Arm me with the sword of your Spirit; your word, put your word in my heart, so that I might be able to demolish arguments and pretensions that set themselves against the knowledge of God.

•Sandal my feet with peace, so wherever I go I would walk in peace and pursue peace, sharing the gospel.

Lord prepare me today to do your will and serve you. I take my stand in the Spirit, suited with the full armor of God, and in prayer.

A Seed, My Journey Part 1

2007-02-07T10:14:00.000-06:00

I have been on a journey— trying to figure out who I am. Like so many moms, I let life take over and I became consumed by home, kids and life. Then one day I realized, "I don’t know who I am anymore"! What was my purpose beyond meals, house cleaning and homework? That’s when the journey started. So… This is part of my journey, what I have learned—

I am a seed. Hang with me, and I will explain.

Seeds are really amazing! They hold all the information to grow a tree, or bush, or flower. Everything is in there! WOW! They look so unimpressive, they are small, brownish and dry, and yet have so much potential.

God’s creation is so incredible, and we are apart of that creation! Like the seed, we have been given a purpose, and the potential to grow into something great--everything we need is already in us. He has equipped us with gifts and talents--he has designed us to produce the fruit he wants, and to serve the purpose he chose.

For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

Now as you know, a seed doesn’t do anything on it’s own. A seed needs to be planted, watered, it needs to be fed by the nutrients in the soil. Just like the seed, we also need to be planted, watered and fed. God has purposed for us, like the seed, to bear good fruit with His nurturing.

You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit- John15:16

So… What have I learned? We are amazing seeds! God has equipped us with the potential to bear good fruit for Him. God has given each of us gifts and talents (and challenges). It’s not about us, it’s about God, who God has created to serve him, who God has created for His glory.

Let me tell you, I am tired of being a small, brown, dry seed! I’m ready to see what this small unimpressive seed will grow into for His glory, under His nurturing hand. I am digging my roots down deep into the soil of God’s love, His word, and prayer. I can already feel the leaves beginning to sprout!

And I pray that Christ will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. Ephesians 3:17

Be still and know

2007-02-03T11:23:00.000-06:00

Be still and know I am God. Even as the wind, earthquakes and fire of life rage around you, I am the quiet whisper... the still small voice. Do not run, scream and hide, I am with you where you are. You will find quietness in the mist of the chaos. I am the peace that transcends all understanding. In my presence is the quietness you desire. Be still and know I am God. You will find rest and comfort, tranquility for your soul, even as life seems to spin out of control. I am God, I am the truth,the way and the life. It is not for you to know the whys and the hows. It is enough for you to know the Who. You cry and beg in turmoil! Peace, peace, peace, be still, I am He. I am the quiet place you are looking for. I have put your feet upon the rock, now rest in me. Be still and know Me, and my will will follow. Close your eyes and you will see, the peace you seek is found in me.

My thoughts on anger. . .

2007-01-05T14:44:00.000-06:00

Anger is the Destroyer of Good Will--
Anger is everywhere, in our families, in our marriages, in the grocery store, on the road.
We all have expectations of how we should be treated, of what others should do, or not do and anger follows when our expectations are not met. We are angry when our husbands don’t call when running late. We are angry when the grocery clerk helps someone else when we were waiting first. We are angry when a friend betrays our trust.

Anger is a powerful emotion! It is like dry yeast used to make bread. When poured out of the package, a few small granules don’t look like much. When we add water and sugar, the yeast grows to fill the cup. Anger often has a life of its own, it grows and sucks in more people, more energy and more time.

I don’t think anger is wrong-- God equipped us with our emotions, anger being one of them. I think the problem is how we see or don’t see people when we are angry. I think it’s a problem when we feed our anger like the yeast and it grows to fill our cup.

A few weeks ago, I was angry! I was so angry I was consumed by it. For 24 hours I was consumed--I yelled and fought back. I said things like “How dare you!”, and “It’s none of your business!”. All the yelling and fighting did not help, the situation kept growing, involving more people, more anger and more hurt.

I finally came crying to the Lord and begged him to show me a way out of the anger that had consumed me for days. I found this verse. . .

Praise the Lord, Oh my soul and forget not all his benefits--Who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so your youth is renewed like the eagle’s. Psalm 103:2-5

In that moment, on my knees, crying out to the Lord I realized he was forgiving my sin, he was healing my disease, he was redeeming my life from the pit, he crowned me with love and compassion and he satisfied my desires with his love and security.

My eyes were opened by the crown of love and compassion. For the first time I saw my situation in a different way. I was able to see the good intent of those who had hurt me. They meant well, it just went all wrong. I was able to see their pain, the pain they had suffered in the past, the rejection they had faced, the hurt they had endured. I realized that they acted out of theie past experience. I could see for the first time their behavior through love and compassion, not anger.

The Lord took my desire to hurt, to make them pay for how they treated me, and he satisfied my desires with good things-- his love and security. My heart was filled with joy as I felt the Savior take hold of me and change my view point.

I have decided from now on, when my anger is small like little dry yeast in the bottom of my cup, I will not feed it and add water. I will look through the crown of love and compassion, I will see the good intent. I will choose to see people as frail human beings who have experienced pain and suffering, rejection and hurt. I will have love and compassion. I will try to see the acting out as a reaction/symptom of past experiences. Even when I don’t know the person's past or their pain, I will try to remember all of us are damaged in one way or another, all of our emotions are fragile. I won’t make everything about me and take everything personally. Often what is directed at me is not about me, but about someone else’s hurt.

What would our world look like if all of us put on the crown of love and compassion? What would our churches look like? How would families and friendships be healed? It is a choice we all have to make-- what view point will we hold?

As for me, I choose love and compassion, the Lord will fill my desires with good things and my youth will be renewed like the eagles. I will choose to see good will. I will chose to not let anger be a destroyer, but an opportunity to show others the love and compassion Christ has shown me.